ART ATTACK

This week is New York's Armory Show and I wanted to share with you some of the highlights.  Gilbert & George had laid out postcards in the shape of the urethra sign (who knew there was a sign and I'm not sure which sign language it belongs to), my favourite was a postcard explaining the meaning of douche. There were a series of photographs making everybody smile of a number of different chairs, some wicker, some plastic, some lined, some holed, and next to each one was a photograph of a woman's naked bottom with the imprint of the chair on her butt cheeks. Finally, New York photographer Lori Nix painstakingly builds tiny models of imaginary places and photographs them to produce these absorbing, strangely beautiful images.

AND WHAT BIG KITCHEN UTENSILS YOU HAVE GRANDMA!

Illustrator Jean-Francois Martin and cookery journalist Esterelle Payany have published this quirky little cookbook with recipes inspired by fictional villains. Unlike a lot of small, stocking-filler type books, this is funny, well-written and the illustrations are beautiful. The Big Bad Wolf teaches you how to make Pigs in Blankets, Brutus makes a Caesar salad and Hannibal Lector shares his recipe for sweetbreads with sherry.

BREAST MILK ICE CREAM FANS DENIED FIX

I'm gutted to hear that Covent Garden's speciality ice cream shop, Icecreamist, has had to  withdraw one of its newest and best-selling products. The jugs, I mean tubs of Baby Gaga, alternatively known as breast milk ice cream, have been confiscated by local authorities when some concerned customers complained that it was illegal to sell food products made from bodily fluids. Can't wait to see what's next on their list...

AND THE BEST OSCAR SPEECH GOES TO ...

Quick extra blog to celebrate the Oscar win for Luke Matheny - not only is his short film fantastic but so was his speech and his hair.

SHOCK DISCOVERY: MOST DANGEROUS BIRD IN THE WORLD LIVES IN AUSTRALIA

The recent floods in Queensland have apparently sent homeless birds wandering into local towns and villages. We're not talking a couple of sparrows, though, but something called a Cassowary. Looking like a cross between a turkey and a dinosaur, this 6 foot, 130 pound flightless bird has three five inch talons on each leg and can be known to disembowel people when threatened. Surprise surprise, the deadliest bird in the world lives in Australia, a continent where I'm sure even earth worms have teeth. 

MARVELLOUS MAPS

If you are someone who finds maps as intriguing as I do, there are two beautiful books out at the moment which should satisfy any cartophile. In Atlas of Remote Islands Judith Schalansky has picked 50 of the most remote islands in the world, places she is certain never to go, and drawn an exquisite map for each one alongside a pocket, poetic, enchanting history. Schalansky makes these islands sound like magical inventions from Jonathan Swift. From Here to There is another gem - a remarkable collection of the rudimentary maps drawn everyday by people trying to remember where the nearest tube is, inventing an imaginary land or drawing something important to them like the inside of their school locker. Kris Harzinski, author of this collection and founder of the Hand Drawn Map Association, has included sketches from Abraham Lincoln to a woman suffering from arthritis who maps where she has been given injections so she can leave her body time to heal.

A PITTSBURGH MUSICAL MASH-UP

Pittsburgh genius Gregg Gillis, better known as Girl Talk,  is an ex-biomedic turned DJ and seems to have perfected the art of the digital mashup with this fab website sampling over 300 songs in 50 minutes. The best part is that you can see what he's mixed while it's playing. More fun since something really fun you did recently.  Did you see the new Justin Beiber film? Did you beat a personal best on the running machine? Hard to believe, I know, but this is better.